My personal progress

Feeling good!! I have set  all my requirements for next years .Many of my choices is made base on my struggles and weakness .I like to challenge myself but not always good to lay things out to be sustainable. Each Year on the team i have learned things that was not expected ! My positive attitude even if i had down moments help me to grow and keep looking for improvement!

 The year of the ox is not done but yet i have to think about the Tiger.In regards of choosing my requirements i need to review my current years.I don’t like to say if it was a good or bad years but to see where i can improve or what i have learned.Everything is a process!!I was in doubt if i should be part of the team due feeling overwhelmed by the amount of requirements set for myself , one of the reason of that is i am allowing more time for others than me .

 I knew i wanted to try the wooden wood for my breaking board.I was confident until i was holding them .I reach out to sifu Rybak for advice.Before the class my pulse was high.While driving i did some breathing exercises.We were asked if we were  nervous so yes i raised my hand!After the warm up i felt i can do it and i just needed to focus on the technic.I did the breakable one first to trust myself.My first wooden board took me 2 attempts,i needed to ajust where i was kicking.Surprised i didn’t have the feeling that i have failed but more the opposite When i heard  the crack of the wood and see it on 2 pieces  i knew i was  able to remain focused and learn from my mistake.I was also guided by sifu scillag and his question what you think went wrong!

 With no reason or even excuses i haven’t blog .what happen?I am still questioning about that.I push back to the next day to the next .Not only on my requirements to blog but also doing this in my personal life not recording my appointment or meeting .Yet i am lucky that i have good memories and i haven’t miss any appointment!So what to do ?They say if you don’t want to trained you trained.I have miss so much classes due of work and perhaps it s started to affect me.I am not in the worst situation than others but the difference is others try to engage more.My plan is to book 2 one/one and attempt to catch up of what  i miss or at least seen what was cover .I will also help in the level 2 black dragon for the break board!

 Lately i have more feeling when something is wrong but not yet able all the time to figure out what .This bring to more questions.Being in the new class is also an amazing feeling due i am on the back row and i can see and learn from the senior belt!.The focus and energy they have can only push me to a different level and realize hurt and pain are not the same and i can do more! perhaps slower .

 The boot camp was an eyes opening for me of how i trained.I was so tired when i got home and sore the next day.Normally i do a bit of everything throughout the day. I survived the fitness test but most important that show me that i should challenge myself with my own training.I never thought i will do meditation due i  don’t like when is quiet but i sure do like it  now .Feeling it to your finger just by following your breath or the lightness of your body and the general peaceful sensation!

 Failure is part of our training and yet we keep training,doing repetition and trying to get better .we don’t gave up or found excuses.I received a watch and that monitors pulse ,blood pressure and more .I got scared with the number i was seeing.The good thing i double check at work and. The number were not accurate but still push me to reflect on my health and the biggest concern is i am still a smoker.Why i stop trying and keep pushing it to later .Honestly before i thought it was good reason but now i knows it was excuses.Time to kick myself until i succeed!